RTV #33 - Turning Cantankerous into Cooperative!

The glass is half full AND half empty!

A Year of Village Raising, Week #33. Turning Cantankerous into Cooperative.

It's a dangerous thing to look at community building through glasses so "rose coloured" that the complexities of human nature is dulled down to an insipid, pleasant monotone. People are COMPLICATED and working with people is COMPLEX! In your village-raising activities, keep your eyes wide open for personalities, characteristics and quirks that make life more interesting, and may create a little more work!

"Difficult people" is a common label used in group facilitation resources. We cringe when we hear that. Similar to parenting, it is the behaviour that might be difficult, not the person! Taking the time to understand why the behaviour is coming across as difficult is one of the keys to turning cantankerous into cooperative!

Think of someone that comes across as confrontational, disagreeable and contrary (at least sometimes!).  Ask yourself these questions to uncover their cooperative sweet spot.

1. Start with yourself - how are you coming across? Are you being clear? Are you threatening the status quo in a way that makes change scary? Are you consistently approachable, equitable and transparent? What is it about you that could be a trigger for this behaviour?

2.  Is the person in over their head? Is the behaviour a defensive mask of a lack of confidence and/or ability? Is there a way to offer training opportunities or group learning that evens the playing field?

3. Consider the strengths of the person, are they being used? Are the being used at appropriate times?  (first question: do you even know their strengths?)

In our travels, we have found that people who have amazing critical thinking skills, or those who are deliberative about risks or those who are involved to work, not to make friends often come across as "difficult" to others who are more idea driven, action eager and glass half-full. Make sure that there is a shared understanding of the various stengths that people bring, and USE them...otherwise, you'll find people fighting the process to try to get some kind of contribution in at all cost.

4.  A group check-in might be in order! Is the group's direction on the same track as when people first got involved? Or has it evolved and left some people out?

5. Is the difficult behaviour actually not difficult at all - but adding a dose of healthy conflict, richness, depth and diversity of thinking? If so, yet people are feeling "bothered" by the behaviour, it might be a time to shake things up. Don't allow group-think to alienate those that have the courage to think differently!

So raise your half-empty and half-full glass up to healthy conflict that keeps community builders on their toes!

RTV - #32 Break the Ice

A Year of Raising the Village: Week #32: Break the Ice

An opportunity for building connections in a community happens when a gathering of people shake off their formal, guarded, business-like demeanor and step lightly into personal topics. People feel good when they are able to share things about themselves. Brief, yet meaningful glimpses, into the lives of your neighbours, colleagues and even policy makers helps to identify what our last week's blog post talked about - the things that bind.



Here are a few easy, non-threatening and actually quite fascinating ideas of things to learn about and share with people;

• favourite children's song or rhyme
• favourite season (and why)
• location of early childhood home
• names of your ancestors 
• what makes your family unique and even "quirky"
• exciting initiatives going on in your organization
• ideas for reducing stress
• traditions  

How?

• If you are part of a work meeting - use these topics as a way of introductions.
• If you are a social media users (whether new or a veteran) - ask your friends and post your own response.
• In your social groups (book clubs, sports teams, service groups) - find ways to bring up more personal interactions formally or informally.
• or try being super random - ask the cashier at the grocery store one of these questions instead of chatting about the weather (imagine how many weather conversations she/he must have over the course of a day!)

As a "village raiser" - challenge yourself to be the first one to - break the ice. 

RTV #31 - Find What Binds You!

A Year of Raising the Village: Week #31: Find What Binds US Together!

What binds us together?

Great question to ask when making summer time S’mores or a great question to ask a team, organization or group when they want to find out what the glue is that holds them together. Often the bind is found in a common purpose or cause that each person finds relevant on an individual or collective level. Once this is found, people tend to reach out to include others in the common cause (much like the marshmallow working with the tasty duo of wafers and chocolate).

In his book Exploiting Chaos: 150 ways to Spark Innovation During Times of Change, Jeremy Gutsche talks about engaging people with four levels of messages and impact. This ultimately leads to the change we seek.

The four levels of impact are at the:

1. Functional level: directs people what to do (i.e. don’t litter)
2. Incentive level: offers a compelling reason (if you litter you will be fined or we will reward people who report littering)
3. Emotional level: helps people remember your cause – keep the memory of your message alive. (Connect the emotions via a story or describe the personal impact that litter has).
4. Cultural level: goes beyond being remembered and gets to the actual action, engagement and change. This includes getting to know your stakeholder view intimately (i.e. in Texas they trademarked a slogan “Don’t mess with Texas” which appealed to the people living there - reducing litter by a whopping 72% over five years. 10-15% was originally projected as an ambitious target).

A cultural connection becomes a reflection of your group’s lifestyle. It aligns with the identity and beliefs of the people you are working with. What you create and what you offer speaks WITH people (not at) and empowers people to use their own voice to forward the movement. It binds you together with one common and compelling vision and helps people champion your work. And in the case of S’mores...it’s a delicious and satisfying blend of oozy-gooey goodness!

Like this? Post your comment here, or give it the juicy thumbs up on the RTV facebook or twitter page. Help Raising the Village become a tasty cultural connection!

Village Raising Question: What binds you with community and has you get involved?

RTV# 30 - Have you tried the chicken-scratch napkin approach?

A Year of Raising the Village, Week #30.

Group Brainstorm: the chicken-scratch-napkin way! Ideas becoming collaborative!

You are about to hold a brainstorm session and expect a real free-for-all in the idea generation department. You're armed with multi-colored pens, energy galore and loads of flipchart paper. You open the space, ask for group guidelines and cheer “let’s brainstorm”. A pin drops...and you hear it. Yikes. In idea generation, this happens from time to time. We have facilitated boisterous brainstorm sessions and the slower, quieter kind.

Here’s one way to boost creativity and expression in your next group brainstorm session:

Hold a chicken-scratch napkin idea festival! Hand out napkins to all participants (possibly several per person). Ask each person to chicken-scratch down all of their ideas for the topic/issue/project at hand. Go around the room and ask people to share their chicken scratch ideas and then toss the napkin into a basket in the centre of your room.

Why would this help a brainstorming session? It invites...

• The sharing of undeveloped thoughts
• More full-bodied uninhibited responses
• Open feedback – both to receive AND give (really, the ideas are quickly jotted on a napkin, how attached are we going to be?)
• A “letting go” of our ideas and the collaborative gathering of many ideas.
• Many great innovative ideas start as a chicken-scratch kind of note - so be open to great potential here!

We are busy writing our RTV activity books which are overflowing with group process ideas, including other ways to extend brainstorming. Can’t wait to share them with you! In the meantime, help fuel the collaborative idea-fire and share YOUR ideas with us: e-mail, facebook or tweet your favourite brainstorming technique.

RTV #29 Are you up for a 30 Day Challenge?

A Year of Raising the Village - week #29:  Try a 30 day challenge.

They say that if you do something (or stop something) everyday for 30 days you can start to form (or break) a habit. Matt Cutts, seen in this short TED talk, did a series of 30 day challenges - always something new, sometimes little and sometimes significant. He offers 3 important lessons from the experience.

1.  Time was memorable. With a focus on the challenge, those 30 days don't just blend into all the other months of the year - they become purposeful and defined by the experiences that were created during the challenge.

2.  Challenges increase self-confidence and spirit of adventure. Cutts found that after a few 30 day challenges under his belt, he became bolder and keen to try challenges that pushed him out of his comfort zone.

3.  The small challenges are sustainable - the big, hard, crazy ones aren't.  What a good community development lesson here! We've seen community builders try to pull off BIG massive changes when the little things are the actions that might actually stick around long enough to truly make a difference!

Consider doing a 30 day challenge of your own, or buddy up with a friend or colleague, or go a bit bigger and engage an entire community collaborative in a challenge. Need some ideas? Take a photograph everyday for 30 days, bike to work everyday, write a book (1,666 words per day for 30 days and you've got yourself a 50,000 word novel) or cruise through past Raising the Village blogs to find some community building ideas: could you pick up litter, connect with a friend, say hi to a stranger, talk to a business about being family friendly, eat local, carpool, share stories, dance, eat with your family.... for 30 days?

We are in for the challenge.  We at Raising the Village plan to take a photo about "collaboration" everyday for 30 days starting today (July 18 - August 16th)!  Follow our pics on Facebook (click here to go to FB and like our page).

What 30 day challenge will you do?

RTV #28 The trust building tango.

A year of Raising the Village - week #28: The trust building tango!

In the late 1800's the tango was the dance craze of the working class. A combination of latin, european and african influences, it is a dance that is filled with dynamic balance, turning, moving at a variety of speeds and, of course, a little romance.  The colloquialism, "it takes two to tango" is as appropriate on the dance floor as it is in community.

Village raising is a dance of action, process, balance and, like tango partners, trust. The trust between two dancers has always been intriguing. When there is an obvious level of trust between partners, a feeling of ease exudes. In our context, the work of building community partnerships and collaboration happens with that same sense of ease only when trust is present among those involved. Whether you are the one taking the "lead" or "following"  (oh my, the fun of a metaphor), there are things you can do to support the trust building process.

In the lead?

• share what you know...be transparent
• deliver on your promises 
• empower others to make decisions and represent the group
• be open and listen to everyone's opinions
• ask for feedback
• assume that others will do what they commit to doing without checking up on them 
• provide appropriate credit and recognition
• admit your own mistakes, errors in judgement and inability to meet commitments, every dancer steps on toes sometimes!

In the role of following?

• accept action items and timelines only when you know you can deliver
• be a staunch supporter of professionalism and confidentiality 
• disagreements happen, always treat other's opinions with respect
• be honest (enough said)
• don't take all the credit in a collaborative group
• lead from wherever you are (reality is that we all have leadership roles - particularly in a collaborative process!)

To build trust - you have to trust and be trusted. Take these ideas for a spin around the dance floor.  The ideas have been inspired by Glenn Parker and Robert Hoffman's book Meeting Excellence as well as tips gleaned from recent dance partners.

RTV # 27 Make A Movement - your way!

A year of Raising the Village - week #27: Make a Movement - your way!

We love how any opportunity (like watching summer shirtless dancers) is an opportunity to learn about leadership and social movements! Watch this clip and then come back and tell us what kind of mover and shaker you are. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fW8amMCVAJQ

So...fun, right? And thought provoking?

Are you:
a) The guts (the gutsy 1st dancing leader)
b) The transformer (the 1st follower who transforms a lone nut into a leader)
c) The connector (the 2nd follower who takes the movement public and brings in more people)
d) The tipper (part of the tipping point, the crowd, who follows and believes in the movement/moment)

How do you typically react? To have a movement – we need it all! Want a little more depth to your mover and shaker style? Go to our main page for your free leadership style quiz http://www.raisingthevillage.ca/